- to give intellectual or spiritual light to; instruct; impart knowledge to
- to shed light upon
It seems to me that most years just whisk by. People talk about what changed in the previous year, and its overall effect, but to me it feels like a blur. I’ve had ground-shaking moments and struggles throughout the years, but I never defined a whole year with one word.
But as this year was wrapping up, a single idea came to me. The idea of fresh understanding, illumination, or discovery:
I am always learning and growing, but this year especially, I feel that God has revealed so much to me that I hadn’t known before. At the beginning of this year, I was in the middle of my senior year of high school. Though by no means perfect, I was in my usual and beloved home, work, and church, with the friends, family, and environment I had known and loved for years. But by the end of this year, I was moved out and living on my own at college, with brand new friends and mentors that had transformed from complete strangers to close friends in just a few short months.
Throughout the year, God has opened doors and illuminated things that I had not understood before. I have found great rest in learning the truth, even the hardest truths, because the truth is light.
God is teaching me independence, and also dependence on Him. He has helped me to quiet my heart, to think critically, and to take ownership of what I believe, but also to give grace and trust Him with the things in life which have value but are not true breaking-points.
I have learned a lot, and I am so thankful for the things God has shed light on for me this year, but I also know that there is still so much that I don’t know. I still have plenty of times when I flounder and fear. So I simply have to go day by day, rejoicing in what God provides for me, and trusting God to make clear to me what I need to know, at the time in which I need to know it.
1 O Lord, my heart is not lifted up;
my eyes are not raised too high;
I do not occupy myself with things
too great and too marvelous for me.
2 But I have calmed and quieted my soul,
like a weaned child with its mother;
like a weaned child is my soul within me.
3 O Israel, hope in the Lord
from this time forth and forevermore.